Swan Dragon part 4

This story is continued from Swan Dragon part 3.

The Beautiful Swan Dragon flew away in search of a New True Love. She landed at a small lake, empty of other birds. She was beat from the long flight and decided to rest there until her intuition guided her elsewhere. Soon afterward she discovered that she was sick. Not only was she sick, but her wing feathers had taken a beating. She inspected her flying feathers. They looked a little torn and frayed. Thankfully she ended her flight when she did. Now it was time heal and recuperate. 

Swan Dragon part 3

This story is continued from Swan Dragon part 2

The Scholarly Duck gets up in the morning with a brand new positive outlook. He is ready to accept that the Swan Dragon’s attention is flattering but very inappropriate. She, of course, does not know him and certainly cannot tell him who he is. Just to prove it, he decides to skip the morning paint. To prove a point.

With the confidence of a Demigod and a flare for the dramatic - opens the door and steps onto the porch. He looks around with pride. Smiles to himself. He preens a little bit. Fluffs up his feathers (imagining he looks big and strong). Full of self-satisfaction, and with a cool, calm and collected disposition - he lifts a foot as if to step off the porch and nonchalantly steps back inside. With the aura of pleasant purposefulness, he paints himself in all male duck colors (browns, grays, and greens), steps out of the house and goes about his day.

Swan Dragon part 2

Story continued from Swan Dragon.

After the Swan Dragon flew away, the Cool Scholarly Duck thought to himself ‘Good Riddance.’ As much as he didn’t want to think about her, the Swan Dragon, he found himself thinking about her all the time. He even found himself talking about her - to his horror. ‘I have to get ahold of myself.’ So he went back to his usual system of pushing her out of his mind. Her. The Swan Dragon. From time to time he catches himself remembering some special thing from their past. About her. The Swan Dragon. He immediately pushes her back out of his mind and finds a fellow male duck or cute girl duck to distract himself with. Then finds himself talking to them about the Swan Who Shall Not Be Named. All of his friends listened and gave encouraging words. Each of them felt a strange sense of jealousy towards the Swan Dragon they had never met, but took up so much of the Scholarly Duck’s attention. And they were each too polite to tell him to shut the fuck up. 

Swan Dragon

There once was a Swan. He thought he was a Duck. He lived in a Duck Pond. In the beginning he was very unhappy. He used to know this Swan Dragon who he loved very, very much. Whenever he thought of her, he used to grow very sad. She was very fierce. Her feathers had electric colors and her temper was so Hot! He used to think if he got too close she would actually spit out fire and burn him! But he knew her a long time ago. He knew her in the beginning in fact. But the beginning was such a long time ago, he forgot who she really was. He forgot who he was with her. 

Kayyisa Loves Pink

Pink is my favorite color. My most favorite color. I have a very specific shade of pink that I love the best.   

  The Jewel on this ring is part of that shade of pink.
          








The pink in this sunset creates such an intense feeling of I-
don’t-know-what inside me, I just have to look away. Lol.

This is a picture of a plant in Hawaii. I absolutely love Hawaii!! I went to Graduate School there. They have soo many plants there that are naturally pink! 

This is me: Kayyisa. Cute Huh? (Ky-yi-sah. There is no “sh” sound anywhere. The “i” sounds like it does in the word “it” or “this”). I’m not sure I want to continue my Swan Life: The Ugly Duck series. I’m not really sure I should claim that I know anything about embracing Swanhood. However, I still refuse to be an Ugly Duck. I know I am a Beautiful Swan. 

My Ugly Duck Soulmate decided he didn’t want to become a Handsome Swan. This stumped me for about two seconds. I asked the Heavens (actually I cursed and demanded for them) to send me a new Soulmate to replace the Sorry Bastard I was given. Honestly, I don’t believe in living unfulfilled. In becoming myself (Beautiful Swan) I discovered that everyone loves me. Every Man is attracted to me. I am very nice, sweet and happy. I used to be afraid of Super Attractive Men. Now I see that we are in the same league. Actually, I am out of their league, because nearly no one has approached me with the confidence I am seeking. I am looking for an ALPHA Male. Being an Alpha has more to do with having Confidence In Self, than being attractive alone. I met one person I would call a Baby Alpha. While still in Hawaii, I met this decent looking guy at my friend’s house. I only met him once before I was ejected out of Hawaii (by the Universe) and into to California to see my Soulmate. 

This Baby Alpha was attractive enough with pretty light green (or something) eyes and dark tan skin. He was Mixed Raced with Mexican, Caucasian and I think Filipino. I love mixed race people. Every one in Hawaii is mixed race. I am mixed race myself. I am half Black Native, a quarter Jamaican and a quarter Chinese. Black Native is my term for Native Americans with a supposed “Black” phenotype/physical appearance. {Side note for Native Americans: We can’t let foreigners come over and tell us OUR History. Us Black Natives know who we are. Don’t let people tell you “Know your history.” By that, they must mean the LIE told to us in the foreigners’ school system.} 

Anyway, back to the Baby Alpha. I was at my friend’s house after partying all night. I had so much fun that night. I went to clubs and danced my ass off. I am usually this nerdy girl who doesn’t know She Is Attractive. So I have practically never even seen the inside of a club. But that night I was dragged out. I found that all these Super Hot Men lacked the confidence to dance with me without the encouragement of my smile. I have Self Respect; something that doesn’t seem to exist anymore. I am very much aware of the Whore Culture that young people think they belong to. By the way, I am 26 years old. (Just yesterday a 20yr thought I was 16.) I noticed that women and men no longer know how interact with each other. Women throw themselves all over men. Men take advantage of women. This shows such an extreme amount of low self-esteem on the part of both the men and women. I am speaking about both men and women when I talk about the Whore Culture. So when men come across me, they don’t know what to do. They are so used to women throwing themselves onto them, that when I just smile at them prettily (or sexily depending on my mood) they don’t know what their role is. I have come across two responses: a) they act shy and do nothing, b) they try to touch a body part and then act insecure when I remove their hand. That night I learned that I was an Alpha Female. I have boundaries and let them be known. I was also the Most Attractive Woman out. I wasn’t wearing anything special and may not have had any makeup on. That’s what it is like being a Beautiful Swan. I know that all Beautiful Women are Beautiful. So I know that I am Beautiful. I also know that all beautiful women are insecure. That is what makes me the most Beautiful: My Confidence is Real. So from now on my Positive Self Talk includes this mantra  “I am the most Beautiful Woman in my Radius (Area).” 

Anyway, I still had lots of fun and did find a few guys to dance with. After arriving home I took a shower and entered the living room, wearing a Sarong (long sheet/cloth that I wrapped around my body). My friend had friends over. These were the same friends that had partied with us. When I entered the living room there was a new person in the house. The Baby Alpha. I am not going to go into all the details of the meeting. The most important part was that he kept approaching me. He kept trying. He didn’t shy away. His approach was subtle. I do not like aggressive idiots. He was nice, caring and sweet. I actually really liked this guy. He made me feel really Attractive, Intelligent and Exceptional. I am confident, as you all know, but it is soooooo nice when a guy makes you feel Special! He said that from the moment he saw me he could tell that I was “A Really Cool Girl.” Everything I said was “Dope” to him. He told me about his passion = Music. We actually spoke a lot even though it was late. I am mixed race but primarily identify as .... a dark skinned Black Woman? It is best to understand that confidence waivers Swans. I do not always feel confident. I loved that my Ethnic Appearance and Dark Skin color was not a deterrent for his affection. That’s my own insecurity (Turned into Symbol of my Beauty). We even discussed Race. He told me that in real life, race means so little. I actually really liked this guy. We would have started dating if I had not been ejected out of Hawaii to meet my Former Soulmate.

When it came to being physical - yes he tried. First in normal ways, such as putting his arm around me. This was acceptable. Holding my hand. This was acceptable. Me, being a woman, I didn’t attempt anything. So when he put his arm around me, I just laid my head on his shoulder. If he didn’t attempt anything else, nothing else was going to happen. Of course, being a guy, his hands began to roam. His hands ran down my legs and up my sides. This was when I gently removed his hands. This happened several times, and each time I gave gentle reminders of my physical boundaries. Mostly, what ended up happening is that he held me and gave me long hugs. Being a woman I knew he was trying to press my breasts against his chest, but they were just hugs so it was okay. He was actually a sincere, loving, caring and sensitive person. I could tell. The way he hugged me - I could tell that he would be a very romantic, sensual and incredibly loving person when being intimate. He has the characteristics that I like in a Mate. Sweet, sincere, caring and confident. My Mate must have these characteristics, in addition to being an Alpha Male. 

The interaction was wonderful. The reason I called him an Alpha is because he had the confidence to keep approaching me. This is a Lost Art when women throw themselves all over men - men no longer know how to approach a non-whore. He is a Baby Alpha because he could have been more Confident. 

So now I am looking for a New Soulmate. He must be an Alpha who is Sincere, Sensitive, Sweet, Caring, Intelligent, and CONFIDENT. Oh, and very Physically Attractive. IMPORTANT: Completely HETEROSEXUAL. Wealthy would be pretty nice too.

Pink has become my symbol that everything is going to be okay. I love pink. I love myself. I love.  

Thanks for reading Swans! I know it’s been awhile. 

~ Kayyisa Raine-Skyy 

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Remember the story of The Ugly Duckling? 

Many people misinterpret this story. Many think the story is about being ugly and magically becoming beautiful. Many try to apply this inappropriate logic to their lives. Hoping beyond hope, that they will one day transform into something better than they are. They miss the true point of this story. The most important part of this story is that the ugly duckling is not a duck. It is a swan that hatched from within a duck's nest. It wasn't ugly and then turned beautiful. It was always beautiful. It wasn't a duck who then turned into a swan. It was always a swan. It just needed to realize this. Once the little swan realized that it was literally a completely different bird, all its duck problems went away. It could be itself freely. It found that it wasn’t ugly after all. It was actually beautiful the whole time! The story is about finding who you really are.

That is the point of this Blog. It's to help you realize that you are already a Beautiful Swan. In order to do that, you must first understand that You Are Not A Duck!

(17) Missing Swan Soulmate: (Private Song)

Hey Swan Soulmate

I made a Swan Cover Song that is my interpretation of how we view each other. I hope you can tell the difference between when I am singing as you and when I sing as myself. I would have redone this song and made it better but I'm trying to keep quiet in this hotel. (Ps. I know the microphone on my other songs glitched whenever I sang too loud.) I know you would rather I reach out to you directly, instead of within this blog. However, since you were willing to let me die when I reached out to you last night, I think this channel of communication is best for now. 

(16) Swan Life: My Beauty

Feb 5 2015

I have learned a very good lesson, many in fact. I've gotten little sleep, wore no makeup, and have cried repeatedly. Don’t worry about the crying Swans. It is part of the process when reinventing yourself, learning new things about yourself, and healing yourself. However, it was also a day I made friends with several young ladies. A day numerous men showed me attention. Let me tell you something about myself. I don’t think of myself as someone who attracts much opposite-sex attention. Although, now I see this has become a normal thing. I have also noticed all kinds of people staring at me. From children, to women, and the elderly. Here's what happened today.

At the mall, a young product salesman seduced me into a shop where I tried on skin care goods. This man, born in Brazil and raised in Israel, was a smooth talker. He wasn’t my type in the physical looks department but I enjoyed our interaction. After a few moments of flirty conversation, he held a mirror up to my face. I blanched and turned away. I said “I don’t look good today. I don’t want to look in the mirror.” He said “What are you talking about. You are a beautiful woman. Your skin is already smooth, I can hardly sell you anything.” Afterwards, for the rest of day I looked in the mirror. Mirrors in bathroom stalls, in my makeup kit, and in store windows. I began to wonder - when the hell did I become beautiful? So now I accept that I am beautiful. Even with no makeup on, having little sleep, and with slightly puffy eyes (from crying). Even though I am not thin and my skin is not the color of the majority. I am beautiful. When I left the shop, half an hour later, without buying a single item - I said to the salesman “Even though I am not buying anything, do you know what you got out of all this...? You got to speak to a Beautiful Woman.” He smiled with the look in his eye of a man, before he knows he's in love with a woman, and silently agreed. I now know I am beautiful. I am a Beautiful Ethereal Swan. Swans, the things you really want for yourself (like being beautiful) are already a part of yourself. Accept it, be happy about it, and let it out! 

Mar 5 2015

I know I have never explained what ethereal means. I am using the term "ethereal" to describe my strong intuitive ability. I feel somewhat like a receiver of information. A receiver of information from where you ask? Oh... the air, the Ether, the Universe. (Ether -> Aether: Greek Mythology) Who knows really. All I know is that I receive information from a source unknown to me, and it feels ethereal. That is why I call myself an Ethereal Swan. We are all different breeds of Swan. Maybe you are actually a Goose! Haha! It is your job to figure out who you are, as I have figured out who I am. I am a Beautiful Ethereal Swan. How will you define yourself? Tell me in a comment below! I know your reading my blog Swans. I see it in my Blogger Statistics. But no one else knows what you have to say. Share it here. Don't worry about being the first one to post. Because really...I'm the first one to post. Write with me Swans. Let everyone else know what you have to say. I have readers from the United States, Sweden, Denmark, Ethiopia, United Kingdom, Ireland, Malaysia and Poland. Tell me what you really think. I'm already the first to post - you just have to the second, and third and the.... you get it. Show your Beauty! Thanks!

(Ps. I know my "Donate" button at the bottom of my page does not work. That is because I do not know how to fix it. If anyone out there can help then please (help Sky hint, hint ;) make a comment. Thanks.)

I know it is getting old for me to talk about my missing Swan Soulmate. But the reality is, if I think of the important things I need out of life, in the form of a Ranking System: The first thing on my list is to be Fulfilled in Love. When you're on your Swan Path, you'll understand. I just learned a new term "Twin Spirits." That is what we are Swan Soulmate. When you are honest with yourself, you will see it too. Good bye for now. Come get me when your ready. Show your Beauty! Ready - Set - Go! Hahaha!

(15) Swan Life: Engagement Rings!!!

Pure Rose Gold, Heart Shaped Morganite Gemstone Ring in a size 6 1/2!

Hey Swans!

I went to the Mall today and tried on Engagement Rings!!! I had so much fun. I am trying on rings because no matter who I actually end up marrying - I will actually be getting married. And soon. I have put it out into the Universe and am now allowing my True Soulmate to reveal himself to me. After trying them on, I realized that my preferences are actually slightly different from my original idea. The first picture (above) is my original ring.

As you can see they are absolutely stunning on me! However, I actually prefer a simpler look - without the surrounding diamond "Halo". A few diamonds are still desirable, but the gold band should be unobstructed. I still want the HEART though. 

Here are two more rings I tried on to get a feel for what I like. These two have a simpler look which I like more. 

Additionally, I learned that only Diamonds are measured in carats. Other gemstones just go by visual size preference. So the important thing here is: Bigger is Better!

Pure Rose Gold, Heart Shaped Morganite Gemstone Ring in a size 6 1/2 !!!

Thanks for Reading Swans!

(14) Swan Soulmate: Soulmate Message Revealed!

I spent all last night trying to edit the Soulmate Message. I made the message on Jan 20th and mentioned it in a post on Feb 5th. Circumstances have changed significantly since then, so I was trying to alter it to reflect things as they are today. However, I became frustrated that it wasn't being expressed correctly. So I re-created my Soulmate message. I have put together a series of 4 cover songs (in message order) that reflect who I am and how I feel about Sky (Scott Hueson Roberts). I love you babe. I hope now you'll understand. The lyrics are located at the bottom of this post. Thanks for watching Swans!

Soulmate Message! 4 Videos (in order)

(13) Swan Soulmate: The Meeting Cont. (2/23/15)

Yesterday (2/22/15) I made a post saying that I was going to head over to Claremont Graduate University and my future Husband and Soulmate may show up. I know everyone’s been wondering who this guy is. He is my very first boyfriend. The first person I ever felt a pleasant psychic sensation the first time I met him. The second person was my most current former boyfriend. You all read yesterday’s post. I took that exact post and pasted it into a Facebook message and sent it to him. Just in case he may want to show up for the Soulmate Meeting. I received a message immediately. This was our first contact in about 1 year. He happened to be heading to Glendora that day. The same city I am staying in!!! We met at Starbucks and went from there. 

(12) Swan Soulmate: The Meeting! (2/22/15)

Today is Feb 22nd '15

I will be spending the day at Claremont Graduate University. My Future Husband lives nearby and graduated from this University. I wanted to visit the beautiful gardens(?) he told me about in the past when we were still friends. The only one I found online is called the Rancho Santa Ana Botanic Garden. So I will head there today until I'm picked up by the family friend I am staying with. I don't know when that will be. Who knows... maybe my Husband reads my blog. Maybe he will go there to find me... maybe, he will even have a Gift for me. : )

(Ps. I Love You)

~Raine-Skyy

(11) Swan Life: Swan Flight

Feb 20 ’15, 8:13 pm

I am flying on an airplane to another destination. I will be in Glendora, California until March 3rd, where I will then be going to the East Coast. My first sister (the second of 8 siblings) is having a baby next month! I intend to be there in person when I officially become an Aunt for the first time. In the mean time, what new surprises will be in store for me in Cali?! Here is the footage from my Swan flight.

(10) Swan Life: Dreams

(I may edit this post later, but for now this is how it came out of me)

Feb 11 ’15

I just woke up from a dream. It’s 9:11 am and I got little sleep last night. I received a call from an old family friend. It is  this friend’s mother who contacted me and will be providing me with a place to stay today on the 11th. He called me at 4:58 am and we spoke for 1 hour and 36 minutes. This was the first time I spoke to him since around 2009. I never knew him very well. He is mother’s friend. Anyway, we had a great conversation where I shared my first blog post with him. He loved it. I saw that I was again receiving what I had recently asked for: Friends who understood me and were willing to take my coaching advice. (I am a [Swan] Life Coach) I am thankful and happy to see my needs met. I can tell that we will be good friends. 

The dream had held a lesson or message for me. This is what I remember:

(9) SwanLife: My Song #2

Hey Swans! I have made another video recording of me singing my personal Swan Song. I know I'm not all that great of a singer, but self expression does not have to be perfect. The song is called Read All About part 3 by Emeli Sande. My version is part 4. It takes me a few tries to get it right, so please be patient with me. Thanks! (Ps. I have an edited version of this that is shorter and neater, with continuous sound. I have it on my youtube page Swan Life: The Ugly Duck)

(8) Swan Soulmate #4: No Call

My Husband and Soulmate did not call. Let me back track. He may have called but I have been out of contact for the past several days. I dropped my phone in the water at the beach and no one has a way of contacting me. I am not aware of receiving any calls at my hotel, but I am not staying there anymore either. I sent him a Facebook friend request which he has chosen not to accept. This means the beginning has not started yet. Stay tuned Swans!!! Thank you all for your support.

(7) SwanLife: My Song

Remember the story of The Ugly Duckling? 

Many people misinterpret this story. Many think the story is about being ugly and magically becoming beautiful. Many try to apply this inappropriate logic to their lives. Hoping beyond hope, that they will one day transform into something better than they are. They miss the true point of this story. The most important part of this story is that the ugly duckling is not a duck. It is a swan that hatched from within a duck's nest. It wasn't ugly and then turned beautiful. It was always beautiful. It wasn't a duck who then turned into a swan. It was always a swan. It just needed to realize this. Once the little swan realized that it was literally a completely different bird, all its duck problems went away. It could be itself freely. It found that it wasn’t ugly after all. It was actually beautiful the whole time! The story is about finding who you really are.

That is the point of this Blog. It's to help you realize that you are already a Beautiful Swan. In order to do that, you must first understand that You Are Not A Duck!

_________________________________________________________________________________


Hey Swans! I have made a video recording of me singing my personal Swan Song. I am going to make one every night for several nights of the same song. The song is called Read All About part 3 by Emeli Sande. I love her because she understands herself enough to know we all need self expression. I'm calling my versions part 4 by Kayyisa Raine-Skyy.  I'm not that great of a singer, but self-expression does not have to be perfect. The song will have several variations as, I change it according to how I feel that night. 

(6) Swan Soulmate #3: The Beginning!!!

(5) Swan Life Lessons #3: First Step Continued

Remember the story of The Ugly Duckling? 

Many people misinterpret this story. Many think the story is about being ugly and magically becoming beautiful. Many try to apply this inappropriate logic to their lives. Hoping beyond hope, that they will one day transform into something better than they are. They miss the true point of this story. The most important part of this story is that the ugly duckling is not a duck. It is a swan that hatched from within a duck's nest. It wasn't ugly and then turned beautiful. It was always beautiful. It wasn't a duck who then turned into a swan. It was always a swan. It just needed to realize this. Once the little swan realized that it was literally a completely different bird, all its duck problems went away. It could be itself freely. It found that it wasn’t ugly after all. It was actually beautiful the whole time! The story is about finding who you really are.

That is the point of this Blog. It's to help you realize that you are already a Beautiful Swan. In order to do that, you must first understand that You Are Not A Duck!

_________________________________________________________________________________


Last time I ended the post with "What do I want? What do I really want."

(4) Swan Life Lessons #2: The First Step

Feb 6 2015

I woke up thinking of these instructions:

Tell everything. Begin post with “I just finished packing today…”

I just finished re-packing today. Today is Feb 6 2015. I moved to Hawaii on Jan 27th. I am no longer in a relationship. When I left the mainland I made sure my (then) boyfriend knew that I was looking for love, marriage and children. I understand that he is not ready for that. We will remain friends. I have until the 9th to stay with a friend of mine. On the 10th I will need a new place to live. Normally I would have stressed myself out looking for a place to live this whole time. But the Universe let me know that I am to wait for my new home to present itself to me. Oh wait..I have not explained everything yet. Let me start again. 

(3) Swan Soulmate #2: The Ring!

As a Swan I know that all my needs are going to be met. It is my job to let the Universe know what I need. This is an engagement ring I bought myself to inform the Universe that I wanted to be married.

(2) Swan Soulmate: Entry #1

Remember the story of The Ugly Duckling? 

Many people misinterpret this story. Many think the story is about being ugly and magically becoming beautiful. Many try to apply this inappropriate logic to their lives. Hoping beyond hope that they will one day transform into something better than they are. They miss the true point of this story. The most important part of this story is that the ugly duckling is not a duck. It is a swan that hatched from within a duck's nest. It wasn't ugly and then turned beautiful. It was always beautiful. It wasn't a duck who then turned into a swan. It was always a swan. It just needed to realize this. Once the little swan realized that it was literally a completely different bird, all its duck problems went away. It could be itself freely. It found that it wasn’t ugly after all. It was actually beautiful the whole time! The story is about finding who you really are.

That is the point of this Blog. It's to help you realize that you are already a Beautiful Swan. In order to do that, you must first understand that You Are Not A Duck!

_________________________________________________________________________________

I know that as a Swan experiencing Duck Life, I must find another Ethereal Swan to be fulfilled in Love. ~ Raine-Skyy Kayyisa

(1) Swan Life Lessons #1: You are NOT a Duck!

Remember the story of The Ugly Duckling? 

Many people misinterpret this story. Many think the story is about being ugly and magically becoming beautiful. Many try to apply this inappropriate logic to their lives. Hoping beyond hope, that they will one day transform into something better than they are. They miss the true point of this story. The most important part of this story is that the ugly duckling is not a duck. It is a swan that hatched from within a duck's nest. It wasn't ugly and then turned beautiful. It was always beautiful. It wasn't a duck who then turned into a swan. It was always a swan. It just needed to realize this. Once the little swan realized that it was literally a completely different bird, all its duck problems went away. It could be itself freely. It found that it wasn’t ugly after all. It was actually beautiful the whole time! The story is about finding who you really are.

That is the point of this Blog. It's to help you realize that you are already a Beautiful Swan. In order to do that, you must first understand that You Are Not A Duck!